The time Alexander Graham Bell rolled over in his grave.

There is a sociological model known as the technology adoption lifecycle. For those of you who have already checked out for Christmas vacation, please don't check out from this post because I promise that the educational value parallels the nutritional value of circus peanuts. Anywho...the model is based on the premise that we all fall somewhere within the spectrum of the technology adoption lifecycle which ranges from innovators to early adopters to early majority to late majority and finally, the laggards. If asked, I would declare that I fit in quite comfortably between the early majority and late majority. Perhaps the fact that I just got DVR earlier this year would lead you to believe otherwise. Or if you have ever attempted to send me an image via text message and I never acknowledge it [Because! My! Phone! Won't! Let! Me!], I suspect that you roll your eyes and discuss amongst your cool tech savvy friends "this poor girl you know" who still has a flip phone that only has the functions of phone calls and standard text messaging. No more, my friends. No. More.

Before we get all oogly-eyed over [the picture on the box of] the shiny new phone, can we please just make a few observations about the old phone? Or more specifically the charger. I mean, seriously...aren't the exposed wires somehow some sort of fire hazard? And just last night the silver trim that borders the keypad on the inside that you see propped up there on the phone like it's being sold on QVC fell off while I was in the middle of a phone conversation. Which really means that it stuck to the side of my face because the 4 year old glue that finally came loose from the phone still adheres nicely to skin. It's been a good phone. It's even been with me through and longer than two boyfriends. We won't compare its reliability and consistency with theirs. Oh...I kid, I kid!

Now I realize that me with this new phone is akin to giving a 16 year-old boy the keys to a Corvette. Lack of experience + Lots of power = Danger Zone. That's why I plan to ease into using a phone that is smarter than me much like I enter a swimming pool: test the waters before diving right in. I'll say there's a pretty great chance that I may even take it out of the box before the end of the day.