Thursday, September 9, 2010

They are my estate.

"I do not wish to treat friendships daintily but with the roughest courage. When they are real, they are not glass threads or frost work, but the solidest thing we know." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have a lot of great stuff. I've seen and done a lot of great things. It all pales in comparison to one of my greatest treasures: girlfriends. We are all created in God's image, but I think that when he was doling out the desire for relationship, we gals got the greater portion. Thank heavens because as much fun as it is to sit in front of the TV and watch the game in complete silence less the occasional grunt and swear word, it's even more enjoyable when chatting with a pal on the phone and even taking a trip to Wal-Mart during half-time all the while remaining on the phone together. [True story, by the way...Georgia-Tennessee]
The bond of friendship between women is quite unique. Men will never understand it, nor should they. There are books, movies, and television shows that try to capture the essence of it. As with most things though, until we actually experience it for ourselves, we can't explain it. And if you're one of the lucky ones to have such relationships with a fav set of gal pals, all the words in the dictionary aren't enough to describe their worth. Especially given that we female types love to talk so much about how we feel. True, genuine, lasting friendships are organic. They cannot be forced or bought...no matter how much your sorority dues might have been.


Girlfriends are the keepers of each others secrets. They are the eyes when one loses sight of her own dreams. They are the masterminds behind our most elaborate plans leaving no stone unturned and not one detail overlooked. Girlfriends are voices of reason when one in the group is stricken with a severe case of laryngitis. They are the first ones we call when our moms, men, or mini-me's have gotten on our very last nerve or hurt us in a way that we never thought possible. They are also the first ones we call when those very same people have caused us sheer joy. Girlfriends are brutally honest with us when we aren't honest with ourselves. They are the ones who fall apart helplessly into a fit of giggles when no one else gets the joke.We begin as little girls sneaking our mamas' make-up and playing with our baby dolls. Somewhere along the way we learn the art of freezing bras and cattiness. Fortunately that stage doesn't last very long, but we still make each other mad when we refuse to leave one of our girls at the home of some boy that we can see straight through even when her vision is clouded. That anger usually subsides as the hangover does. And then suddenly one day, we're all grown up. We buy dresses that we're only going to wear once with that new pair of shoes that we're going to wear once. But it will be a Saturday that we'll never forget so it's worth every dime. Girlfriends visit each other in the hospital to celebrate births and mourn deaths. It's a for better or for worse relationship of its own kind. Paul teaches us in Romans that we are to "rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn." I think this verse sums up quite simply the primary responsibilities of friendship. In the last year and a half, I've done my fair share of both. What comfort in knowing that I wasn't alone. Regardless of their own circumstances, my girls have been right there with me through mine. I want to be more like them. They each have their own unique qualities. Each one loves differently. One is quiet and shows up at the most unexpected yet most appropriate time. Another sees a situation and immediately sets out to repair or improve it. One listens to me talk and then speaks when she knows I'm ready to listen. Another I can call at 11:45 at night because I know that she's still awake too. I could continue, but the point I'm making in those examples is to illustrate that God's design is evident even in the dynamics of my girls. When He put them into my life whether it be when I was 5 or 19 or 25, I had no idea what was beyond Hickory Flat Elementary, Phi Mu formals, or my twenties. But God did. And he knew that I would need them all along the way. Inevitably the dynamics of such friendships will change as a result of time, distance, and circumstance. Some strengthen while others weaken, but they all have their place. There is comfort in knowing that not only are there a select few who know your history, they are a part of it. They are my estate, indeed.

[August was a friend-filled month. To see more of my shenanigans with some of my favorite people, hop on over here.]

2 comments:

Katie S. said...

I believe the "Team Heather" t-shirt activity deserves a full blog posting and/or email explanation of what happened. That looked fun! I love the t-shirts girls!

Angelina said...

here, here! beautifully written and quite true.